The ultimate Brittana love story
by gurj14
Summary: This is fanfiction of Brittana fanfiction. Warning: BRITTANA FANFICTION PARODY (aka not to be taken seriously)
1. Chapter 1

HI GUYS THIS IS FANFICTION OF BRITTANA FANFICTION, THE ULTIMATE BRITTANA LOVE STORY.

lol.

Two girls are walking in opposite directions. They see each other. OMG" says the first girl, who is also a blonde. The other short girl who wears heels so she is sometimes the same height as blonde one or taller feels connection and hears the "OMG" and she turns to reveal herself a Latina.

So the hot blonde and the hot Latina are now in love.

"What is your name?"

"I'm am Brittany S. Pierce."

"I am Santana fucking Lopez."

They both go to a club and see other from across the room. The Latina gets jealous that Brittany's amazing dancing is making a lot of others drool.

They have wild bathroom sex. It is wild because sometimes the Latina has a girl!peen and other times Brittany is a badass vampire.

They move in together. Santana is a lawyer/doctor/singer/glasses-wearing-on Fridays/Werewolf and Brittany is a dancer/genius/dancer/genius/dancer. They fuck in all rooms of their house but this time it is romantic because… oh nevermind. It was romantic but now it's dom-sub. Some say Britt is a dom and some say San is the dom. Only Lord Tubbington knows.

"I am a lesbian, Brittany," Santana says, "but sometimes despite this I sleep with guys in alternate realities so that I can get pregnant and be angsty until you come because you're my soulmate even though I always figured I'd fuck other lesbians. Thankfully this isn't the case because you are already here so like, I can get you pregnant with my G!P."

Brittany says, "But now I have the girl!peen not you so I will have to be the one who gets you pregnant. It's a pretty big dick."

"Oh shit," Santana says, "but I'm a lesbian. I don't' do penis."

"Oh. Just become Santiago," Brittany says. "Everyone knows that's your male name. And then you'll have an even bigger penis."

They are very troubled with how to proceed now that this obstacle has happened.

"Surprise motherfuckers," says someone.

It is Quinn.

"Santana is my lesbro," says someone.

It is Puck.

"Blaine, Blaine, Sebastian, Blaine," says Kurt.

Damn. If Kurt is there where is Rachel?

"We must find Rachel," Quinn says.

They all have to find Rachel. But what about the other Glee friends? Mercedes and Sam and Mike and Tina. They must all be in this fairytale somewhere too.

Brittany picks Santana up and wraps her legs around her waist. Then Santana picks Brittany up and wraps her legs around her waist.

"Brittany I forgot to tell you that my boobs are fake."

"Santana I forgot to tell you that I have a vagina again."

That dilemna is solved. They can finally be the lesbian/bisexual girl on girl duo – oh no!

Quinn found Rachel.

CLIFF HANGER!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: THIS IS PARODY because EVEN ULTIMATE LOVE STORIES NEED A HAPPY ENDING and some crack humour is good for the soul, like chicken soup.

* * *

><p>Santana insults Rachel and Finn and calls Mike and Tina Asian and puck's Mohawk a squirrel. Brittany's kisses her cheek so she stops being mean and Santana asks brittbritt to marry her.<p>

Quinn calls Santana whipped and they slap each other until Brittany stops it and says "to stop the violence!"

Santana and Brittany have been married for five weeks now. They love Lord Tubbington very much but want children. One morning while Quinn eats bacon in their kitchen, Brittany says in her duck-printed pajamas holding her rubber bath duck that matched her duck slippers 'Santana I'm pregnant."

The Latina curses, the g!p has caused problems again. Her Mexican third eye should have seen this coming..

Within months the baby has arrived, it's a spitting image of Brittany with blonde hair blue eyes and a duck onesie.

It becomes obvious to them they need more children. They need to have one that looks like a miniature Brittany and one that looks like a mini Santana, and at least one that looks like both of them combined, obviously.

To get Santana on board, Brittany takes her to breadsticks because Santana loves breadstix a lot she eats so many of the breadstiXXX she loves them so much and Brittany loves Santana so she also loves the breadsticks at BreadstiX.

"Santana don't forget to chew your food."

"you are a genius Brittany,' Santana says, in awe of Brittany's wisdom which presents itself again when Brittany suggests they pay money before leaving.

Santana sings to Brittany love song by Artist

_I love you baby_

_Baby I love you so_

_Love_

She sing the chorus looking into Brittany's eyes which are leaking tears at being serenaded.

_I love you so much, yeahhh_

the love song is over.

Brittany says, "San."

They gasp and stare at each other in shyness of the nickname. Santana likes it.

"Is it okay if I call you San?" Brittany asks her.

"Yes of course it's okay britt," Santana assures her very fastly before her eyes widen in shock at shortening Brittany's name.

"you can call me britt," Brittany assures her.

Brittany then leans over and kisses Santana's lips, they moan each others names "San" and "BRITT"  
>loudly and touch each other fondling one another with touches and kisses, their tongues battling for dominance.<p>

**Okay ohmigod this is my first time writing smut!**

(written for Dragon89 and their hilarious reminder review, and cuz "it aint a fanfic unless their tongues battle for dominance").


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